The thing about humans and relations

When did we enter did this world of consumption? It seems to me lately that everyone is “shopping” for a better deal, especially in relationships.

It seems that a lot of us enter relationships with a checklist of all the items their partner must meet. The pressure and the expectations are so very high that we can only fail at being the one that meets all of those criteria.

There was a time when people we settling for someone healthy or with means. Those were times of survival and it was logical to act accordingly. Still in those years, people were not quitting the relationship at the first sign of trouble.

We are now in the world of shopaholism where we throw away easily because we have this conviction that we can find better, that we can find someone more tailored to our needs. Finding someone has become some kind of extreme sport where we aim at finding a better adrenaline rush, a more ultimate someone.

And excuse for doing so? “I’ve been hurt in the past”, “I’ve been burnt”. A quote from Alan Ball says a lot about this: “you hang on to your pain like it means something, like it’s worth something”

Well, tough luck people: life hurts, love hurts. Only quitters and losers throw away the towel easily. Real strong people stay and work things out until nothing else can be done about the relationship.

Those are the real winners.

(For Diane)

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